it felt like
the blood might as well spill to the floor
might as well let the tension out
can't hold it anymore
all is safe wrapped under a tight smile
and just waiting to disappear again
lose my number
uninvite yourself I've never wanted your help
if I'm lucky I'll die here in my soft cocoon with my electric shields
strangers talking nonsense
cut yourself off or I'll cut myself off
can't bother to speed the situation up
looks bad
my might wandered way down the well and she done drowned
no birds round the fountain
she stagnated in the water
the way the film grew up top and threw her
glued her to the bottom
so if we were religious,
the church began to rot
and Jesus was too scared to love on Magdalene when her demons were a haunting
Jesus never heard any spirit and so the spirit didn't bother
no witnesses and nothing to regret
but since we're not religious
Spring in February
Fires in the Summer
Winter is salty melt under gray under gray
Autumn is an afterthought
Who cares
I haven't seen a tree in a long time
but when I do she'll be breathing
and the bush will be burning
and I'll be running to and from the shade
the woman waiting for me at the top of the tower was a living fairy godmother
beautiful in purple, gray hair done up so pretty with her curls
dark skin and tasteful glasses
her smile looked like everything was going to be okay
and she showed me the mirror that said
you're already okay baby
you found your way out of the labyrinth
past the turtles and babies and with the help of old friends
see how they don't hold you against you?
feel the sun on your skin
sat with her until I woke
crawled up out the well covered in vernix slime
its the only way sometimes
the birds came down and did their best
tried to peck her clean but she's bloody mess
dripping vile and stinking with a crooked smile she loudly thanked them
she howled to Magdalene and said don't wait on Jesus, check this out
creaking and sloshing in her enormous crustaceous bornagain shell
nothing can touch her and she's in love
the iridescence lit up in Magdalene's eyes and she understood
I'm keeping my blood where it belongs for now
and the medication's treating me bad but I just got love bombed
and I'm just trying to speak
and I'm just trying to be honest
and I can't know if I am until I learn later
so I might as well say something
get involved in my life
its not an effort to stay happy until it is
then it might not be worth much striving
seems like after I wanted to die I want people as much as quiet